Mary Tolman

Mary Tolman Obituary, West Point, UT :: Myers Mortuary

Helpless but Hopefull

We Shall Never Forget (9-11 Tribute)

 

Let the world always remember,

That fateful day in September,

And the ones who answered duties call,

Should be remembered by us all.

Who left the comfort of their home,

To face perils as yet unknown,

An embodiment of goodness on a day,

When men's hearts had gone astray.

Sons and daughters like me and you,

Who never questioned what they had to do,

Who by example, were a source of hope,

And strength to others who could not cope.

Heroes that would not turn their back,

With determination that would not crack,

Who bound together in their ranks,

And asking not a word of thanks.

Men who bravely gave their lives,

Whose orphaned kids and widowed wives,

Can proudly look back on their dad,

Who gave this country all they had.

Actions taken without regret,

Heroisms we shall never forget,

The ones who paid the ultimate price,

Let's never forget their sacrifice.

And never forget the ones no longer here,

Who fought for the freedoms we all hold dear,

And may their memory never wane,

Lest their sacrifices be in vain.

Alan W. Jankowski

 

Helpless....watching the World Trade Center fall, the Pentagon, and the heroic passengers on Flight 93. How could something like this happen? How could I help? I only graduated High School 3 months earlier. I had just finished my last summer as a "kid". Started a new job. Slowly working my way into the adult world. 9/11 made me realize that I was no longer a kid. Life was no fairytale. And yet I was so far away physically that sometimes it felt after watching live and then the news coverage over the next few days there was nothing I could do to help.

 

What could I an 18 year old hundreds of miles away do? We should or patriotic side, prayed, and kept on keeping on. I often would find myself thinking about the people who could have caused such devastation. How could someone do this to someone else? How could there be such evil in the world? But hope in humanity through the stories of people helping each other out of the buildings, people running in those same buildings. People picking each other up off the ground and running with them.


Lydia's thank you note from a few years ago

The stories of people like Frank De Martini and Pablo Ortiz who saved 77 people from the 88th floor. Flight attendant Betty Ong from Flight 11 who reported the hijacking of the first Airplane so when others went off radar traffic controllers where aware of the possibility of more hijackings. Stories of many others gave me something to cling to not all people are bad. And that is something to be grateful for.

 

Lydia's thank you note

And now 14 years later I realize that sometimes a few bad people will still try to hurt humanity. And if I let myself dwell on it I would feel hopeless. But hopeless and helpless are dark areas to be. Light cannot exist where darkness is. So I must choose to look to the light. To have HOPE. To watch for the heros, our uniformed ones as well as ordinary people who are given the opportunity to choose to step up and do. Hope that this world that I am raising my children in will one day be a place that they feel safe. Safe to live their lives and if they choose, a place that they will feel safe raising children of their own. That is my greatest hope. THEY are my greatest HOPE.

L to R: Lydia, Alex, Chase, AJ, Taylie, Tracie, Austin

 

 

 

Wordless Wednesday

Coming January 2015

Dollar Tree Duet

Every Tuesday Taylie has dance class from 1:45-2:30, so the boys and I will run errands or their favorite: exploring the Dollar Tree. They have so much fun finding little treasures and looking for something for "their best girls", their sisters. They open their car doors, help them out of the car and escort them and me into where ever we are going. They love to be gentleman. They walk my visiting teachers to their cars and open their doors too. It warms my heart to see them try to be gentleman. We have had to help them learn that it is okay to ask if they can help an elderly person down the hall at church or to their car. It is not okay to loudly tell them "You are old, let me help you" over and over again.

The Dollar Tree employees are so nice to my kids and love to ask them questions and how school is going. Just don't tell them they have the same face. I think they chased that employee half way around the building telling him that they are twins! It was pretty funny.

Two weeks ago while waiting to check out they heard the customer in front of us say the sleeping medicine her doctor put her on makes her forget her alphabet in English and in Spanish. And the next thing I know my boys are singing their ABC's at the top of their lungs for this women. She was very friendly and asked them to help her sing it so she could remember. So their duo became a trio and they started to gather quite the crowd. My children love to preform, they have never been the shy type and so of course they were delighted with the attention they were receiving. The lady thanked them for helping her remember. As the cashier started to ring up our purchases of Valentine decorations the woman thanked them again for singing with her and asked them to sing it one more time. They happily obliged and the trio put on one last performance of the Alphabet song which was greeted with a round of applause from the workers and a few other customers. Which pleased them very much and made their day.

While I am sure not all of the customers where happy to hear the alphabet. To this mom, whose babies where preemie, and have had a hard time learning their alphabet and recognizing letters it made my heart swell with joy. They have picked up so much these last three months and are enjoying Kindergarten so much. They hate when the weekend comes or holidays because it means they will miss school and their teacher Mr. Meilkhe who they just adore. I am so glad that they are loving school and can't believe that my little boys are old enough to be there.

We love you AJ and Austin and are so proud of the young men you are becoming, your caring for others, and how hard you have been working at school. You are both going to do great things if you keep on studying and being the gentleman you so love to be.

So if you are ever bored on a Tuesday afternoon between 1:45 and 2:30 just stop by Dollar Tree, because you never know when you might be serenaded by two of the most handsome boys you will ever see.

 

Wordless Wednesday

A hundredfold

 

"The Lord compensates the faithful for every loss. That which is taken away from those who love the Lord will be added unto them in His own way. While it may not come at the time we desire, the faithful will know that every tear today will eventually be returned a hundredfold with tears of rejoicing and gratitude."
- Joseph B Wirthlin
Our Heavenly Father loves us, we are his children. We were sent to Earth to make choices, receive a body, and have free agency. While he may not step in and stop the bad from happening I promise that he will never forsake you and that his Angels both in heaven and earth will help us bear our burdens. Trust in Him. Have faith in Him. That you might one day receive the blessing of exhalation and have that which has caused you to grieve be turned into blessing one hundred fold. His arms are open beckoning us to come and turn our burdens over to him.

Below is the story of a young mother who at the age of 28 was left a widow with 5 children to raise the youngest being just 6 weeks old. Her husband was murdered by the husband of the person he was having an affair with. An affair which she did not know about. It is her journey of healing and forgiveness. 

http://themomentswestand.blogspot.com/

My Twins, Best Friends for Life

These handsome dudes started Kindergarten this year!

For Time and All Eternity: LDS Temples



Zoe Elizabeth Tolman

 I will never forget the day this little girl walked into my life. With her beautiful blond hair and stunning eyes and her spunky personality. She was splashing away in the swimming pool with my brother and her mom. She was laughing and talking a mile a minute. It was love at first site. I had to stop myself several times from saying "Come see Aunt Tracie!" Because I wasn't  her Aunt, although it may have slipped out once or twice.

 

My brother had always told us that he would never marry and if he did it wouldn't be for a very, very, long time. So when he brought a date to our family reunion it was a BIG DEAL. And not just that he had brought a date but one with this beautiful little girl, I had to hide my shock. Because he told me that he was waiting to have kids till Lydia was old enough to baby sit for him. I don't know if he knew it then or not, but I did. This little girl was going to be my niece.  

 

And it wasn't long before this:

 

Once they were engaged Derek's name was placed on her Birth Certificate. He was on his Mission when she was born, but her biological father chose not to be involved. And that is okay, she is his. They have the same personality and if you didn't know it you couldn't tell because she looks just like him. He is her Dad, and she is my niece!

 

And on January 8, 2010 They were sealed for Time and All Eternity:

Jaydie, Derek, and Zoe

Lydia, Zoe, and Trinity

Jaydie, Derek, and Zoe

 Other than my own Temple Sealing, watching families and couples be joined together for Time and All Eternity is some of the most sacred and beautiful experiences I have ever had. People who through adoption, or are already married to finally receive those wonderful blessings that they have waited for, to have the people they love sealed to them forever there is nothing quite like it. It is a very special experience. And once you are Sealed any children born to you are yours forever too!

 

A few weeks ago I was teaching Zoe's class in church and during singing time we sang the song: Families can be Together Forever she turned to me with tears in her eyes and said: Aunt Tracie do you remember when I was sealed to my family forever? I do it was the most wonderful day! It was hard for me to hold my tears back and I wrapped my arms around her and told her I did, and it was a wonderful day!

 

A few days later her little brother Rockwell was born, he had trouble breathing and was in the NICU for a few days. Our family prayed and fasted for his health and for his parents. He is home now and doing well.

Zoe, Jaydie, Rockwell, Derek, Pyper

In our religion we believe that when we are married in the Temple that it is not just for this life, but that the family unit continues after death. For Time and All Eternity. Isn't that wonderful! I know it is true, and that we are not just sealed to our spouse and children but to our parents and grandparents as well if they were sealed in the Temple.

Adam and Jeryka

 What a wonderful day it was watching Adam and his wife Jeryka being Sealed, the joy on their faces will not be something I will ever forget.

Brad, Kristin, and Shaylee

 Brad, Kristin, and Shaylee on the day they were Sealed. I remember the spirit was so strong when they brought Shaylee in there wasn't a dry eye in the room. Such a wonderful day.

Alex and I, Alex being Sealed, Meleah's Sealing and Kolya's Endowment

The top picture is of Alex and I on our Wedding day when we were Sealed as Husband and Wife, for Time and All Eternity. The middle picture is of Alex and his family on the day he and his brother where Sealed to their new parents. Alex and Kolya are adopted and so even though his parents where married in the Temple they still needed to be Sealed to them.

 

The bottom picture is of my niece Meleah, she is so special! She made me an Aunt! She was 18 months old when Alex and I got married. She was adopted by Alex's mom and Dad last summer. She was so excited she could hardly hold still! It was a blessing that she had waited a long time for, all of us had and the excitement in the air was very contagious and lasted all day. Alex's brother Kolya also went through the Temple for the first time that day. It was a day full of spiritual blessings.

 

I am so blessed to have the gospel in my life, especially the blessings of the Temple. That my husband, children, parents, brothers, nieces, nephews, brother and sister in laws, Alex's parents, and all our grandparents will be a family forever. I couldn't ask for anything better.

My family
Austin, Alex, Tracie, AJ
Lydia, Taylie

Salt Lake Temple
For Time and All Eternity
Alex and Tracie
March 5, 2005

To learn more about LDS Temples please visit: www.lds.org





All grown up!

Wordless Wednesday: March 5, 2013

Triple the Birthday fun!

February 4, 2013

Happy fifth birthday AJ and Austin!
Happy third birthday Taylie!

We love you!

 

God is that you?

I took Taylie to the bathroom during church Sunday and as I was pulling up her little tights she looked  up to the ceiling and said: God is that you?

I looked around and asked her who she was talking to and she said no one. It was so cute. I hope that all my kids can realize that God is always there for them, loves them, and knows them by name. Even if they can't see him.

And lastly I hope they know that they are sons and daughters of God and that he loves them as much if not more that Alex and I do. They where His children before they were ours. And one day we will be able to walk back into His presence and we will know him and love him as we do our Father and also remember our Mother their. And that we will be together forever someday, as one huge family unit. How awesome will that day be?

Dearest Children

My Dearest Children,

I want to tell you about a little girl named Emilie Parker.

Emilie Parker taken off of her Facebook memorial page

* She was beautiful. She was blond.She was always smiling. She never missed an opportunity to draw a picture or make a card for those she around her. The world is a better place because Emilie was in it. She loved daisies and the color pink, she especially loved pink daisies. Emilie was six years old, she loved her family and loved to help people.

Taken off of Emilie Parker's facebook memorial page

She was a first grader at Sandy Hook Elementary. One day not long before Christmas, Emilie and her classmates started the day. They did not know that a bad man would come. This person killed Emilie and 19 of her friends. And six Adults who tried to protect them. There is no answers to why, but hearts broke around the nation on that December day. As a mommy and daddy you will learn that as much as you love your children and as much as your daddy and mommy love you that sometimes we cannot protect you. It is part of our free agency we were given when we chose to come to earth. And sometimes people chose to use their free to make wrong decisions, and as much as it hurts we must have faith, that Heavenly Father has a plan for us. And that he has angels all around us, some that we can see and some that we can't to help us on this journey called life. Jesus loves you and each and every person on Earth. And as we grow older you may notice that more bad things happen, and that life is not always happy. But after each sorrowful event I want you to notice the love that pours out to the community or state.

Pink Ribbons for Emilie at my work

 I want you to remember that God is love, and as long as we allow Him in our lives and have faith in Him, he will never give us more than we can handle. Lean on Him and those around you and He will carry you through anything. Prayer may not always be allowed in our schools, but no one can keep you from having a prayer in your heart. And as long as you carry a prayer in your heart then He will be with you in school. I wish that I could keep you innocent forever, and shield you from the bad of the world but as you grow and become adults the world becomes a bigger place than just our home or your school. The world will be yours and the choices you make will effect everyone. So my wish for your would be to become a person that you are proud to be, a person people look to for comfort, a person people can trust. A person who loves his fellow man. Love one another as Jesus loves you. And if I could teach you anything else it would to be a forgiving person. As Emilie's Father stated, He expressed no animosity, said he was not mad and offered sympathy for family of the man who killed 26 people and himself. What an amazing person, to forgive the man who took his daughter, but he knows that he will be judged the way we judge others and we all can use forgiveness.

Christmas in Heaven 2012
 

 

Twas' 11 days before Christmas, around 9:38
when 20 beautiful children stormed through heaven's gate.
their smiles were contagious, their laughter filled the air.
they could hardly believe all the beauty they saw there.

They were filled with such joy, they didn't know what to say.
they remembered nothing of what had happened earlier that day.
"where are we?" asked a little girl, as quiet as a mouse.
"this is heaven." declared a small boy. "we're spending Christmas at God's house."
 

When what to their wondering eyes did appear,
but Jesus, their Savior, the children gathered near.
He looked at them and smiled, and they smiled just the same.
then He opened His arms and He called them by name.
 

And in that moment was joy, that only heaven can bring
those children all flew into the arms of their King
and as they lingered in the warmth of His embrace,
one small girl turned and looked at Jesus' face.
 

And as if He could read all the questions she had
He gently whispered to her, "I'll take care of mom and dad."
then He looked down on earth, the world far below
He saw all of the hurt, the sorrow, and woe
 

Then He closed His eyes and He outstretched His hand,
"Let My power and presence re-enter this land!"
"may this country be delivered from the hands of fools"
"I'm taking back my nation. I'm taking back my schools!"
 

Then He and the children stood up without a sound.
"come now my children, let me show you around."
excitement filled the space, some skipped and some ran.
all displaying enthusiasm that only a small child can.
 

And I heard Him proclaim as He walked out of sight,
"in the midst of this darkness, I AM STILL THE LIGHT."

Written by Cameo Smith, Mt. Wolf, PA

Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends.

John 15:13

Picture and Poem found on Sandy Hook Facebook memorial page.

*Excerpts from Robbie Parker, father of Emilie Parker.
 

May we always remember and never forget, the names of these babies and the teachers who died protecting them at Sandy Hook Elementary in Newton Connecticut. December 14, 2012 

Country Fair Days: The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly

I know I promised pictures but here is videos via my Dad.

Taylie at the Baby Contest (Queen division)

The Boys "barrel racing"

Lydia at the end of her Fun Run.

This is how Lydia's Sheep ride ended......

Once I get the video from my Dad you can see
what an awesome job she did....

until she fell.
Along with the whole story.

Our Crappy Camping Adventure!

Remember or visit to East Canyon last year over 4th of July?

Well this year Alex's family reunion was to be at East Canyon. We prepared much better this year, we bought a bigger tent, another hammock with a bug cover just in case, and a prep tent that keeps the bugs out while you eat or prepare food.

Our camp site

Taylie has been potty trained and so I didn't think it was a problem having her where panties. Well she had her first accident in 2 weeks while we were there. It was a huge mess. Luckily my SIL had a pull up and we put here in that. She kept it dry the rest of the time.

My boys and Alex at the pool

We had an exhausting day of playing at the playground, unpacking, swimming, and roasting marshmallows. We stayed up late, very late and we were so exhausted. The kids fell right to sleep as did Alex and I.





Sometime in the night AJ decided he needed the bathroom....unable to wake Alex and I because of the events of the day he decided to stick his little bum out the tent door and relief himself. All over the tent, inside the tent, his PJ's and hands. He then proceeded to climb back into the sleeping bag with his twin brother. I awoke to the most awful smell.....I asked if someone had an accident to which they replied Tay was poopy. The diapers and wipes where in the car and it was almost morning so I decided to wait to change her. That and without my contacts I am as blind as a bat. Taylie wasn't poopy.

Come morning we discovered his "gift". He and his brother were covered from head to toe. The sleeping bags, extra blankets and warm clothes we brought them were all ruined. So I stripped them down and walked the quarter mile to the showers only to find they were closed for cleaning. I begged the lady to let me in. I was ready go home. While I showered the boys (Austin was so tired he walked into the shower with his underwear still on) Alex cleaned the tent the best he could and started their clothes and sleeping bags in the laundry machines. Thank goodness we were at a camping resort. It took all day to get the smell out. With help from Julia and Kolya who took febreeze and zipped tied the sprayer down and threw it into our tent.

Uncle Jon and Taylie

I am glad we stayed though we had fun with the nieces and nephews, swimming, napping, and cooking over the campfire.

My nephew Caide and I

Alex managing the fire

We only had a few burned marshmallows. Alex (my fireman) was in charge of the fire and kept it nice although he did teach the kids to start it using bug spray. After one of the twins tried it he decided that wasn't such a great idea.


Saturday we went on Jet Ski's. Never again in my life! I saw my life flash before my eyes! The kids (but AJ) loved it.

All in all it started out crappy but we ended up having a great time.

Lydia and Grandpa Turner

AJ and Grandpa Turner

Thanks to Jody and Tyler, and Jon and Steph for planning it and for My Mother in Law for providing fun toys for the kids. 

The Boys and Grandpa Turner

Wordless Wednesday: My boys

Tator Tot Turner

So recently my children have started talking about when they will get a new brother or sister. Well the older three, Taylie says she is the baby. They talk about what they want to name it, if they want a boy or a girl and if we should have twins again. They even told my friend the other day that mommy is having another baby (which I am not).

The names they come up with are things like Mckenna to tator tot. Tator Tot Turner....

I want more kids, some days I think I am ready now. Other days I am so done! Alex says when Lydia is 12 he will consider having another. He has talked about it more recently. I think though that after we take the kids to Disney next year. The boys will be starting kindergarten and it would just be Taylie and me at home during the day. And she would be almost 4, how old Lydia was when she was born. We have done the 4 under 4 thing.

I worry though about having an age gap.....and jealousy.....none of my other kids had that but they were all 2 years apart.

Any thoughts? Age gaps good or bad.

Dance Marathon

So after getting the kids to clean the living room we had a dance marathon. We took turns showing off our skills which range from the boys Karate and "egg rolls", Lydia practicing for her dance recital  and Taylie copying her. And I even participated, it has been awhile but I must say I rocked the handstands, sommersaults, cartwheels and backbends. It was fun.....we will see how my muscles feel tomorrrow it has been at least 10 years since I have done that.

More things the kids say.......

Me: AJ your shirt is on upside down, come here I will help you fix it.
AJ: Mom, stop ruinning my life. You are ruinning my life.
Me: Because I want to help you with your shirt?
AJ: Yes, you are ruinning my life

AJ: Here I come stinky mango!!!

Taylie has a cold so I asked Alex to start her humidifier. She starts screaming NO NO NO set me on fire!!!

When asking what happened to all my pens:
Austin: Mom, we are secret agents, we have to have a secret agent pen in every room.
I find them all over the place hidden in weird places.

Lydia: Mom! Call the Tooth Fairy! I lost another tooth but I want to keep this one!

Where did the time go..............

I just realized that there is only around 20 days of school left. I feel like I have missed the last 2 months of my life. So here are some of the things that have happened that should have been blogged about before now and have not.

• Lydia learned to ride a bike with out training wheels
• Lydia lost her first tooth
• Lydia started soccer and has made some awesome goals!
• Lydia learned to make breakfast which was a big help when I was sick
• AJ gave his first talk in church. He kept calling it his speech it was so cute
• AJ announced to primary that I was going to help him with his talk.
• AJ also started playing soccer and is loving it.
• Austin gets to give his first talk next week
• Austin loves soccer and has a great dribble
• AJ and Austin love to take care of me and be Gentlemen
• Taylie is talking in full sentences. Having conversations. She is growing up.
• Taylie started asking for her crib back, she hasn't had it in over 6 months
• Taylie likes to cause trouble........
• Taylie loves her Best Friend Lydia and likes to walk hand in hand together.
• Alex transferred to a new concrete plant in Murray to hopefully get more hours.

As for me I am feeling better for the most part, still run out of energy quickly but it is getting better. I miss my friends at work and being able to work there or even around the house and yard. Soon though.

I can't wait for summer fun! No schedules, just family and fun. BBQ's and snow cones, fireworks and parades.